I’ve been with my girlfriend for a year and a half now and I’m beginning to get the push. That’s the term I’m going to use to describe it. It covers occasions where friends and family say things along the lines of ‘so errr….you’ve been together for quite a while now…errrrr when are you errrr gonna pop you know, the errr, the question’. It first came up at my cousins bar mitzvah when me and Kate had been dating for less than six months and my mothers cousin (oh, bless him) asked if we were engaged. What a question. Oh brother. It meant that we had to have a chat about it, to work out what we both thought of his ridiculous outburst and what it meant. Luckily for me Kate is very much on the same page as me for most things but I imagine there are a number of young men who do get engaged because people keep asking them when they are going to do it, after a while if you’re of a particular mindset/temperament/thin skin then those things start to burrow and grow.
I don’t have any issues with getting engaged or the sanctity of marriage, one day I would love to get wrapped up in all that but for the time being I still feel very young and I’m not going to let other people influence when I change my life. I have friends who are happily engaged or even married who orchestrated the thing entirely under their own steam and not as a result of the push and it seems to be working for them. The important thing to remember is that like most things there is a choice, and for the time being I am perfectly happy with what I’ve got going on.