Paul Schiernecker

Author: Paul

  • Housekeeping.

    I apologise in advance that this is going to be a boring blog post, I’m not even going to blast it over the usual mediums, I just need to process something and this is the first way I thought of doing it, I might as well have scrawled it on a bit of paper.

    I’ve been considering turning this into an actual website, rather than it just serving as a blog. The plan is to have one place, one website where I can share my blog, music, videos and stories with you, at the moment I don’t know what I’d call it because WooWooCoolBastards is a bit too heavy handed to serve as a title. I’d like to think that the comments I get directly through WordPress and on Twitter and Facebook would continue to grow, along with my views, which have risen with each passing month since I started the blog in February.

    I find it quite infuriating having to jump back and forth through different social networks trying to drum up interest and hope in time people will sign up to receive notification of any additional posts by email and then I’ll stop berating everyone all the time to pay me attention.

    Apologies again, I’ll be funny or something tomorrow.

  • Murder – a flash fiction piece.

    He only came to as a drop of blood slid off the lowest point of the knife and splashed on the linoleum. It had all been a beautiful dream to him and yet when he had kicked that state away he was still there, he was still in it. He didn’t know the body, but he had known the girl, the girl who had made him too angry, she had been warned against him enough times but she thought love conquered all.

    He wiped both sides of the now red knife on her skirt which clung unnaturally to the pale skin beneath it. For some reason he couldn’t stop himself from shaking so headed into the family room to pour himself a stiff drink from the decanter his in laws had bought him for Christmas.

  • Mr Nice.

    Last night I finished reading Mr Nice, for the second time. Like Charlie in Perks I will always try to read a book twice to make sure I get it all, to capture it better in my memory. The book got me thinking about marijuana and the way it is seen in the eyes of the law.

    Mr Nice is the story of Howard Marks, an Oxford graduate turned marijuana smuggler in the late 60s. It’s an incredible story encompassing a rock n roll lifestyle with daring and narrow escapes and eventually the long arm of the law. Throughout Marks maintains that he is just transporting beneficial herbs, and that what he is doing is nowhere near as deadly as the alcohol or cigarettes markets which are legal in Britain and throughout most of the world.

    I can’t help but side with him. While what he did was illegal the way he justifies it makes you realise just how ridiculous the law is in this field. I know plenty of people who have fallen foul of the law while in receivership of marijuana and like Marks their punishments didn’t really match the crime. Marks spent seven years in a US penitentiary with murderers and rapists, and to me that doesn’t make a lot of sense. I believe that the real reason for such stringent laws on marijuana smuggling is that the governments know they should be getting a fat chunk of that in tax. That if it were legalised it would limit the cost added to the seller as the means by which it would be obtained wouldn’t be illegal and dangerous and as such a tax could reasonably be placed on its sale. Then again maybe that’s just this whole hippie brain of mine, but it would certainly solve the recession.

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  • What the heckle?

    Last night I went to see my friends perform as Los Desperados, a comedy group specialising in sketches and improvised comedy. Having worked with all of them at one stage or another as part of the Improv group I attend I know how talented they all are, how funny they can be, and exactly the kind of atmosphere you want from an audience in order to achieve what you’re setting out to do; to entertain. Unfortunately this wasn’t a possibility last night because a group of people insisted on trying to jar their every attempt by heckling. The fun part about attending an Improvised comedy gig is that as an audience you are given the chance to join in, to add ‘gifts’ for the performers, the tools that they then use to perform a scene but that is where the interaction ends.

    I have a massive issue with heckling and hecklers, I struggle to work out the purpose behind it is. It doesn’t seem to add anything, it detracts from what is going on onstage, and in time it gets to the ‘players’. I can only assume it is an attention-seeking method, maybe the fact that someone else is in the spotlight is too much for these people, that maybe they can’t stand the thought that they could have been a star, that they could have been somebody. If they took the time to turn their oh so clever heckles into something worthwhile or constructive then maybe they would hold some merit, but the fact of the matter is they were like an airhorn during a golf match.

    Luckily my consummate pals were able to turn it around in the second half of their show, they took the time to show that they meant business, and eventually were able to get on with their show but from talking to them afterwards I realised that it had got a lot deeper than they would make it seem onstage, it wasn’t that they were hurt by individual comments, it was that the show’s impact had been lessened by pissed up wankers who for some unknown reason can’t keep their mouths shut for two hours. That’s what bothered them, the fact that their hard work might have got lost before it reached the audience, at least somebody was bothered about that.

  • Faith test.

    I am not a religious man.
    A po-faced sow; who’s advances I had recently spurred, once told me that one of the things she hated about me was that I had no faith. I don’t think there has to be any link between the two. Obviously you have to have a lot of faith and belief in order to ignore the science that has disproved most hard-backed religious but it is not irrevocably intertwined.

    As an example, this weekend I have had my faith tested for the first time in a while and I wanted to share it with you. The problem started when I picked up my recently purchased copy of  the Writers & Artists’ Yearbook 2012. The book acts as a guide for writers and artists looking to get published, it provides general advice as well as a directory for publishers and literary agents in the UK and overseas. It was recommended to me by a school friend who recently had her first novel; Found, published.

    The issue that the yearbook has given me is that for the first time I am taking stock of exactly how hard it is to get a book published. I know it’s something that has been niggling away at the back of my head but this weekend it has very much come to the forefront, ruined my appetite and sent me to bed early. I’ve woken today and gone for a run, and it has instantly made it a lot better. I’ve realised that if I have any doubts then it is because my novel isn’t ready yet, that I need to read it again, as a completed work, before I send it off. On my run I also drafted the cover letter and synopsis for my novel in my head and feel ready to take it on today.

    My advice would be; sleep on any decision, nothing is certain, you can afford the time, and you have the faith.

  • Moonrise Kingdom – an almost review.

    I should probably begin by saying that this post may be biased, and if it is I will not be apologising because I cannot praise Wes Anderson enough, he does incredible things with film.

    Moonrise Kingdom is the new comedy-drama co-written and directed by Anderson (who it is fair to say is one of my favourite directors). The film stars an incredibly varied cast including Bruce Willis, Bill Murray, Edward Norton, Tilda Swinton, Harvey Keitel and Jason Schwartzman but the main stars are newcomers Jared Gilman and Kara Hayward who play teenagers in love (Sam and Suzy) on the run in a New England town. The story centres around that feeling of being young and foolish and falling for someone completely regardless of the circumstances.

    The film is earmarked by Anderson’s dry sense of humour, the characters are interesting and flawed, the landscapes are all beautifully devised and it has such a sense of escapism that I’m struggling to recall my thoughts on any moments or scenes that grabbed me in particular. The enjoyment I got out of Moonrise Kingdom is mostly down to the relationship between Sam (Gilman) and Suzy (Hayward). The dynamic between the two perfectly displays that combination of being old enough to feel you can do adult things and yet at the same time holding on to those precious things from childhood that define you through. An example being the books that Suzy reads to Sam as they settle down each night round the coast of the island New Penzance. The attention to detail through out is exactly what is needed, and the film feels very personal, although somewhat elaborated upon, as though this is the feeling of a first love being captured forever.

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  • Mancrush Friday – Jason Schwartzman.

    And here we go, another delve into the closet. This week I have chosen Jason Schwartzman, a man who can absolutely and categorically do no wrong in my eyes. His films are brilliant, his music is brilliant, his TV show is brilliant, his hair… etc.

    I’ve worked out that a lot of the appeal for Schwartzman is the same kind as that I have for James Franco (a man who will no doubt make it onto my Friday blog in the near future). What I mean by this is that neither of them are happy in just one field, they may have cut their teeth in TV or film but they don’t let themselves become ‘film stars’ – whatever that may mean. For Schwartzman this means choosing a very specific type of role, a choice I hope is provoked by his history of working with Wes Anderson and the like. The films and roles are always just shy of the big hits or the blockbusters, they’re always a bit quirky or a bit niche, in a similar way to how Bill Murray chooses to select work.

    The other thing I love about Schwartzman is his music. I don’t know how well known a fact it is that he was the drummer for Phantom Planet (best known for ‘The OC theme song’ AKA California). Schwartzman has since taken it upon himself to release two albums under the moniker Coconut Records through his own label; Young Baby Records. Both albums; Nighttiming (2007) and Davy (2009), first appeared online as digital downloads and were later released as physical discs. Tracks from both albums occasionally crop up on soundtracks but never really broke through in their own right. In a recent interview I’m sure Schwartzman said he would like to record another album, which to me at least proves that it doesn’t matter about sales, if you enjoy doing it, and it doesn’t compromise anything then just carry on. That’s what I’ll take from Mr Jason Fracesco Schwartzman, it doesn’t matter what anyone else thinks, just be happy with what you’re doing.

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  • Doctor Zuckerberg

    So thanks to Benjamin over at Life Rapture I am now completely addicted to the Bloomberg documentaries Game Changers, a series which profiles the elite men and women who have defined the way we act and think about finance, sport, music, technology, politics and culture. I imagine I’ll be blogging and tweeting about my findings quite a lot in the near future. It’s made me think a lot about my own drive, and my own need to achieve my goals, and how I’ve only just come across my intentions and how solid theirs are or were so early on.

    One of the biggest surprises I have encountered so far is the story of Mark Zuckerberg, popularised by the 2010 film The Social Network (based on the book The Accidental Billionaires by Ben Mezrich). Zuckerberg for those not savvy to any of the terms and names I’ve just pulled is the founder and CEO of Facebook, the social networking site which has captivated the world in the last decade. I enjoyed The Social Network but I watched it as a film, it was hard to imagine the real people and lives behind it all, as though it were all just a hilarious concoction of Hollywood but watching the Game Changers documentary made me realise just how powerful Zuckerberg has become, and how willingly we allowed that to happen.

    The first thing I should mention is how impressive his morals are, he knows that Facebook is bigger than any amount of money that can be thrown at him (including a $1.5 billion bid from MTV). I like that. The fact is that most ‘entrepreneurs’ to use a blanket term will happily sell on their idea as soon as the price meets something they can roll about in for the rest of their days, but Zuckerberg recognises that what he has created would be lessened by it being passed over to someone else, that it would cheapen his efforts since its creation in 2002.

    The second issue that arose for me from the documentary was how much Facebook now knows about us and our habits. The genius move behind Facebook is that it is all user generated content, we are the suppliers and we are the product and we are the target market, that means that anything that is done is being stored and who knows where that will lead. I know this is a terrible thing to admit to but I wonder what will happen to my Facebook page when I die, where all of those messages will go, whether someone will continue to run it, whether people will still put music videos on my wall, thats a huge impact to make on someone, he has changed the way we think about everything, the way we speak, the terms we use, the way we contact each other, the way photos are handled, it’s an incredible gift to the world but I struggle to accept that Zuckerberg is happy with that, content in the knowledge that he has helped a lot of people (if you ignore the negative and bitchy side). After all he is a businessman, and don’t let him fool you with those flipflops and hoodies.

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  • Prometheus – an almost review.

    I’d better start off with the usual warning that I’m going to spoiler the crap out of this so if you haven’t seen it and are planning on seeing it in the near future then don’t read anymore.

    Prometheus is loosely linked to Alien, and is helmed by Ridley Scott, a winning combination in many eyes including my own. It’s set at the end of the 21st century as a group of scientists and engineers head out on a two year snooze to the Earth-like planet that they believe spawned us. As a fan of the Alien films I was filled with a childlike sense of glee at the setup, the slow build towards the inevitable action, a cyborg who loves Lawrence Olivier, brilliant. It should be noted that the cast are strong throughout. It’s nice to see Roomi Napace doing something other than kicking dildos up people’s arses. Charlize Theron in a catsuit is worth the ticket price alone and Idris Elba holds his own as the ‘no shit’ captain. The problem I had with the film once I had fully digested it, was how everyone seemed to have an alternative agenda for the trip.

    The scientists wanted to disprove Dawinism, Weyland (Pearce) wanted to meet his maker before he met his maker, David (Fassbender) seemed to just like touching buttons and it all got a little bit lost. As soon as the masks started to fall away the film did as well, interesting little character stories fell by the wayside as Scott just matched on for guts and glory. Don’t get me wrong visually it was absolutely incredible, and scenes harked back to the wonder of the original Alien and it’s noteworthy sequels but this felt confused, like Scott was trying to keep too many people happy at once and not really getting the message across.

    I’m not saying its a failure because the alien pregnancy scene is still replaying in my head in much the same way that John Hurt’s alien belly does from the original, but there is just something that jars about it. It’s worth a watch regardless.

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  • God bless you Ma’am.

    Hello, sorry, I took a couple of days off. There was an incident involving too much alcohol and a snooze in a toilet on a train that you don’t need to hear about. The important thing to note is that it’s Tuesday, it’s exactly 9am and I’ve run two and a half miles this morning, which still isn’t that important.

    I wanted to talk a bit about the jubilee celebrations. Firstly it should be noted that I’m a massive fan of shouting ‘smash the state’, talking about a new world order where we all just cuddle each other and I think that the royal family are a massive burden on my life (except Phil the Greek who is just the brilliant kind of awkwardly placed racist I can really get behind). Yesterday I went to a jubilee party which was cracking fun. I think in a few ways this weekend has brought out the best in people, it makes you appreciate the wonder of being British, whilst hushing up a lot of the nonsense in our lives/country/government, and sweeping it under the bunting. I don’t know if it’s because of the extra bank holiday (if you’re lucky enough to have an employer who recognises such things), or just because it makes people take stock of the fact that we’ve got a good thing going (yes that was an attempt to paraphrase Sid Owen) but everyone seems a lot more British this weekend.
    I can’t say I’ve ever felt particularly British, which is probably partly down to my mongrel breeding and partly due to the fact that I could never place exactly what it meant, after this weekend I have concluded it means eating a lot of trifle, drinking a lot of Pimms and singing Ob-La-Di, Ob-La-Da too loudly whilst simultaneously cursing Peter Kay for using John Lennon’s middle name when introducing Paul McCartney to the stage outside Buckingham Palace. I can settle for this kind of British, it’s in my comfort zone. Sitting in my lounge last night with a cup of tea, a stack of sausage rolls and watching the jubilee concert really set it all into place for me. I’ve heard people today griping about the fact that they didn’t have whoever on at the gig but the problem is that heritage artists are the ones who truly celebrate what it means to be British. I don’t think a lot of ‘current’ artists have any longevity at all and that was reflected in the line up, it’s not T4 On The Beach, it’s a celebration of 60 years on the thrown and I think the variety was spot on. If you have an issue with it you can have words with velvet voiced Gary ‘bent over for a knighthood’ Barlow who organised it (apparently).

    What I hope is that this weekend doesn’t end in terms of the spirit it has evoked, I hope we can have a faultless Olympics Summer and that we can get back to being Great.

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